I woke up one morning with a weird feeling. I felt like floating. I went to the restroom to pee; it was a little painful. I plugged the portable heater, arranged our things and when the water was hot enough, I woke up Grey. That was my every morning routine.
We went to work together, ate breakfast at the canteen and proceeded with the day’s task. I did not mind the strange floating feeling until I nearly bumped into the glass door of the office. Later, I went to the company clinic and the nurse was surprised because my temperature was 40 degrees centigrade! She prepared the exit permit then I went back to the office to inform my teammates that I would be on sick leave.
I called up Grey to let him know of my condition. He asked me to proceed to the hospital for further check up. I went to our favorite hospital for a second opinion. I was expecting to see my OB-Gyne but another doctor was on duty. She asked me to have a urinalysis but later changed her mind. Instead, she took a urine sample using a catheter and the result was unfavorable.
The doctor told me that my level of infection was very high and I needed to be confined. I told her to please just prescribe any medicine because my family was not there in the city. She agreed but warned me that I needed to take a week long rest.
I bought the expensive medicines at the pharmacy. Good thing, it has always been my practice to save a little money for the rainy days. I bought some grocery and then headed to our unit to rest. I texted Grey that I was home. There was no reply.
It was already dark when Grey arrived. He looked sullen. I tried my best to sit down but I was too weak.
“I should have been confined. The doctor saw something.”
“You just have a fever.”
“I have UTI (urinary tract infection) but the doctor said that it was a rare case because the level of infection was too high…and she saw some lacerations, too.”
“I have another problem. Somebody accused me of stealing something in the office.”
It was the first time that I saw Grey in that depressed state. What depressed me more was I was too weak to even comfort him. Part of me wanted to blame him for my infection because had he not been too hard on our lovemaking, I wouldn’t be sick in the first place. It was our first time to face such a trial and we were young and inexperienced to handle it.
I couldn’t remember if we ate dinner or if we had the appetite for it because both of us were shattered. But I remember waking up in the middle of the night chilling.
“Grey, please embrace me.” I said.
He embraced me with tears in his eyes. He must have been crying because of the accusation.
“We can make it, Grey.”
It was one of the very rare nights when he did not touch me in a sexual way. He had his own worries and the thought of losing his job was killing him.
I woke up feeling better though the trip to the restroom was a challenge because of my trembling knees. Grey went to work and did not leave any food. I opened the grocery bag and took some biscuits. I texted my mother that I was sick and I would be home within the day.
My mother took me to an OB-Gyne for evaluation. She did not buy my story that it was just a simple case of UTI. The OB-Gyne performed a pap smear and the result was favorable. The exact nature of bacteria was not known because of the strong medicine that I took that killed it. The OB-Gyne did not mention a fresh laceration so I assumed that it has healed already.
Looking back, I should have assessed that our relationship was only “for better” and not “for worse.” In health, Grey was there to manipulate me and use my body for his sexual fantasies. In sickness, he didn’t mind if I had food or water as long as he was living his life.